36 — A Celebration of Becoming
I turned 36 on 4th July. Yaay and yikes maybe? I am closer to 40 than I was to 30 now. But for the first time in a long time, I can honestly say… I love living my life. Not because it’s perfect. Oh no, there is always something to improve. I haven’t ticked every box or figured it all out just yet. But because I finally feel like I’m living in alignment with who I am (and not following projections of who I thought I should be).
It’s taken time. Some undoing. A lot of unlearning (still work in progress). I look back at my twenties and even early thirties, and it feels like I was constantly trying to fit into something — expectations, roles, timelines (if I could get a dollar every time someone asked when I will have babies, I could afford a trip to New York). I did a lot of experimenting with what I want to do. I tried different jobs, lived in many places around the world. All of those experiences, of course, have shaped me in some way, taught me valuable lessons, and provided some much-needed reflection. But inside, for a very long time, I felt off. Unsettled. I didn’t understand myself much. I certainly knew I was emotional and could explode on the spot but spirituality wasn't particularly big part of who I was.
36 feels different.
Something shifted in me these past couple years. Slowly, I stopped outsourcing my worth. I let go of the idea that I need to earn rest, love, or softness. I started paying attention to what truly lights me up. I started trusting my energy, my body, my emotions.
Most part of this journey has been spiritual. After experiencing a panic attack for the first time (it was late 2019), I knew my body was trying to tell me something. I took it as a sign to explore myself more. To dive deeper. I tried many things and visited many specialists+healers: meditation, journaling, reiki, yoga, therapy, coaching (coaching did give me a huge mental health improvement, and I was able to start climbing out of my long depression).
And then, in late 2024, Human Design found me. Or maybe I found it when I was ready. I learnt that I am a Projector - an energy type that is here to guide others with clarity, insight, and deep emotional wisdom. Projectors are not meant for more work, but they are designed to see more. Studying it has given me language for things I always felt but couldn’t explain. It’s helped me honour the way I naturally move through the world — my rhythms, my energy flow, my decision-making. It’s not about putting myself in another box. It’s about understanding the mechanics of how I work so I can stop resisting myself all the time. I finally accepted myself as a whole, and that’s been a game changer.
36 isn’t a flashy number, but it feels grounding.
“I’m proud of the life I’ve created for myself and who I am becoming. ”
It feels slower, more honest, and deeply mine. I get to work with women, hold space for them to be seen, and build something that feels like an extension of my soul. I’m not interested in climbing anyone else’s ladder anymore. I’m interested in depth, connection, presence, and showing up as my self. There are so many layers yet to unpeel (like an onion, I suppose), but I’m excited to see how I will feel in five years’ time.
So, here’s to 36.
To the version of me who no longer needs to prove herself.
To the woman who trusts her own timing.
To the years ahead, full of softness, strength, clarity, and continued becoming.
Thank you for being part of this journey!
Want to stay connected? You can find me on Instagram @irenacima.photography.